One of my favorite people has an affection for hyperbole.
(Now that I mention it, a few of my favorite people do.)
For Futchie everything is the MOST,
grandest indescribably huge profound larger than life
dramatic event with a bad case of Giganticism,
EVER!!!!! (!!!!)
She's also a writer, so she can be pretty convincing.
We grew up together and spent a lot of our
teen years inseparable.
She would gesticulate wildly with her hands
and I would sprain my eyeballs rolling them.
Ah teenagers.
Insufferable.
When she got a bad haircut,
she was shorn like an abused sheep.
If she broke up with a boyfriend,
her soul was scarred beyond recognition.
When she got a teen age zit?
Face leprosy.
Biblical style.
Well apparently my teenage unconscious is still alive,
and Sweet Futchie has tutored me well.
This baby loves to teeth,
and she's got
FACE LEPROSY BIBLICAL STYLE!!!!
People stop me in the street
and want to talk about it.
A lot.
Yes thank you,
I've tried this,
and that, and also the other thing.
No she doesn't seem to mind.
Yes, it looks very sore.
It's teething.
I don't tell them about the face leprosy.
So when she's slathered with an
anti-face-fall-off-cream
she shouldn't be in the sun.
And since her sisters got
this and
this,
it seemed only just that she too
should get a little Biblical bonnet.
See what the creams did to her face??!!!
Sometimes it's best to just leave
well enough alone.
Um,
I mean the lamb is modelling the flip side.
Do you think I should submit this
to one of those before and after shows?